Q&A Wednesday

And once again it's time to answer all the fantastic questions I got this week.

Heather asked:

Do you still relate the same with friends and family as you had related with them pre-surgery?

I think that this is a hard question, because some probably would say that they haven't noticed any changes - but others would say they've seen big changes. I certainly think that I'm now a little more outgoing than I was before surgery... although - I'm still incredibly shy. I also probably stick to my guns a little more and stand up for myself more than I ever have before. I think the surgery has given me the freedom or confidence to deal with some things that I never would have before... and in some cases relationships are better, but in others they aren't.

The hard thing though is knowing if it's the surgery that has changed me - or my deepening faith because both journeys started at about the same time... and both are life changing occurrences.

Have you lost friendships or connections since you underwent surgery and made all of the changes that accompany the process?

I have lost some friendships in the process - some where due to my being able to let go finally. I had the confidence to let go, and stand up against people treating me unfairly. Again though, one week after my surgery occurred - our old church merged and basically dissolved... so I found a new church at that time, and truly feel so incredibly blessed. I have kept in contact with a few of the ladies from the old church, but I lost several of them that I was close to at that time.

In terms of just strictly a weight loss surgery look at it - I'd say that I've gained much more than I've lost (with the exception of one relationship in particular). I have had the ability to meet more women and get to know more people since the surgery because while I am still a wall flower - I have managed to take at least one step away from the wall. (if that makes any sense) I have met and gotten to know some incredible women over the last year!

Not only that, I've gained friends through this blog - which I wouldn't have started if it weren't for this weight loss surgery journey... so the gains out weigh the losses for me.

JLI asked:

Since you mentioned liking the Carpenters, I must know, what are some of your music "must haves"?

I'm not much of a music person - so I wouldn't say that there are "must haves" but interestingly enough it totally depends on what I'm doing.

Driving: SonicFlood or any other great Worship Music that I've been listening to at church if that isn't working... Old School (70's & 80's) Country music works for me.

Working Out: 80's Pop Hits, 90's Pop Hits/Rap, Country, music from the movie Rocky, more Old School Country, Worship Music, and even some Celine Dion works for me... but whatever it is - it HAS to be fast paced.

I don't really find myself listening to much else... my iPod is a trip though... bizarre music from all sorts of decades and genres.

What do you most look forward to as summer approaches?

It's funny because here in Houston we don't so much look forward to summer... the blazing heat and humidity will knock you down before you ever get out the door most days from about April through October. So... I'd say that I look forward to:

• flip flops
• summer dresses
• getting out in our boat
• the possibility of buying my first bathing suit since junior high school
• potentially getting the guts up to ride on a tube behind the boat again
• no sugar added ice cream - Coldstone anyone?

And, generally experiencing life with John in a different way as we both continue toward healthier versions of ourselves.

Staci asked:

What would you change about your personality?

I think I'd make myself more outgoing and worry less about what other people think of me. I find myself so crippled by worrying about how other people are going to react. It's weird because I don't find that as much in my writing - but certainly I won't go outside of my norm and test the waters much in real life.

Other than that - I'd probably wish for more determination to push through things when they start to be painful... like workouts - I wish I had the drive to constantly push myself to the limits and see where I could take this body of mine. I am doing that on a very small basis, taking baby steps... but if I really had that in me... I'd do more like what they do on the Biggest Loser - push you past the breaking point!

Laurie asked:

Do you feel that you and John have formed an even deeper bond since he has had surgery as well?

I don't know that our bond is any different, but it is certainly eye opening... there are so many things that I've forgotten about the initial stages after surgery. He is such a trooper though - I mean he doesn't let it slow him down much... not that he's ever let much of anything get in his way. I think it will certainly be a benefit to both of us because I can be a sounding board for him on things that worked for me at the different stages... and at the same time, I'm learning from him as well.

Do you both relate to each other on even more levels now?

I think this will get better as he moves through the stages - he's still on a full liquid diet, so there aren't many similarities in our diets right now. We are both working out as many times a week as possible, but as he moves into solid foods again - I'm sure that we'll be pretty even. He's so much more adventurous in the kitchen - and comes up with great ideas that I wouldn't come up with... so I look forward to sharing a new cooking life with him in the future.

I think it'll also be extremely cool to watch him go through this transformation - because he was so supportive of me and I want to see only the best for him... I know that this time next year it will be a whole new world awaiting us!

Alright, so what's on your mind this week... ask your questions in the comments, and I'll be back to answer them next Wednesday!